I need to write, like advertisers need to put pants on their advertisments.

It is official. I have moved to the Dilworth area of Charlotte, NC. Dilworth is the community about a half mile to a mile and a half of the downtown Charlotte area. It's teeming with young professionals, cool looking older homes, good restaurants, bars, coffee shops. It's the city life I've been craving. I figured now that I should have more time, since I actually usually finish work at 5, I should probably look for a second job to pay for my habits. Those habits being coffee, cable tv, and traveling to South Africa for the World Cup. These are important habits to support, one stains your teeth, one rots your brain, and one potentially could kill you in a plethora of ways.

The reality is that I actually want to save money for these items. Hence, I figured I'd do something about it. I've always wanted to work in a coffee shop. This would be a very profitable endeavor as it would not only pay me, but support one of my habits, that being coffee for those of you wondering.

I have searched for barista positions. (Which I was slightly disturbed to realize that even males are baristas. I thought maybe as a male you would be a baristo. This is not the case.) Not being able to find any, I did what any self respecting 26 year old would do. Search Craiglist. I found a tab for both "writing gigs" and "writers wanted".

I thought to myself, "Self, this could be a great opportunity. Not only would it make you sit down and write, which would actually help me keep this blog updated because I am at times a slacker, but it would get you paid." I searched. There were a couple of ads that offered more than a little information to be desired such as "Looking for writers to write reviews. Please send cover letter and resume, along with writing samples for consideration." I decided to respond, but did not want any of my information out there in case it was a dismal attempt to steal my identity.

Here is the response (I have removed the reply back information):
Hi there,
Thanks for your interest in the website reviewer position. We are currently looking for honest people with a keen eye for detail to visit various adult sites online and write the things they like and dislike about each. We will require 12 reviews per week which are due by 2pm EST every Friday.

The starting wage for this post is $350 per week which rises after 6 months. No previous experience is required for this position. The only requirement we have is that you submit a 100-word review of the member’s area at a pre-selected site (www.exposedcelebrities.net). It's completely free to join so don't worry about any costs (be sure to cancel within 3 days or you will be billed).

Please submit this review to ... within 48 hours if you're still interested. This position can be taken from anywhere, it's going to be a home-based position. If this isn't for you we thank you for your time.

Thanks for your time

Yes. If I so chose I could have written reviews for dirty websites. Thank you craigslist. Naturally, I think this may be many other dudes dream jobs.

This is the conversation that went through my head.
"Hi Mom. Is dad there? Put him on the phone too."
"Mom, Dad, I have a paying writing gig."
"Yeah. I'm excited too. It pays $350 a week."
"No, it's not degrading at all. I review porn sites."
"Yes, I am an expert at that. I have a keen eye for detail."
"Is this weird for you all to hear?"
"Would you feel comfortable telling grandma that I made it as a writer."
"Thanks. I love you too. I'm glad you're so proud of me and helped me be the man I am today."
"The world will never be the same. Writing reviews is just the start."

It's not that I'm totally against writing porn reviews. It's just that I couldn't write any porn review with a straight face. Maybe, I'm not mature enough. Maybe, I'm just not the right guy for the job.

Insert joke where ever. I'm off to find a writing gig, or some other kind of gig that involves something where the people around me wear pants (which was originally a reference to the number of super bowl adds containing men without pants). Wish me luck. Hopefully I'll update this more and more as I continue to settle into my new life and schedule.